HSP in more detail

credit to its rightful owners


Highly Sensitive People

freedom from having to hide their sensitive natures behind a veneer of hostility or self-assurance.

ability to pick up on subtleties that others might miss — a look, a feeling, a message embedded in a seemingly straightforward statement. "It's like they're wearing an extra pair of glasses," she says.


take longer to make decisions, need more time alone to think, and are generally more conscientious about things like remembering birthdays.

greater activity in areas of the brain concerned with high-order visual processing, with participants spending longer examining photographs given to them while they underwent the test, and in general paying closer attention to detail than non-HSPs.

HSPs might have been written off as shy or even neurotic, but Aron believes these labels are demeaning and inaccurate. Shyness, she says, is a learned response; HSPs are born with a heightened sensitivity meter.

feelings get hurt easily, and that this huge sector of the population is mistakenly being written off as weak and thin-skinned.

Certainly anxiety is a big component of the HSP's experience. According to experts, HSPs suffer from what is called sensory-processing sensitivity and are more susceptible than ordinary people to both internal and external stimuli. "They have an innate tendency to process things more carefully,"

"They tend to be aware of subtleties and are therefore easily overwhelmed by their feelings." An HSP doesn't just cry while watching a film like The Notebook — she experiences actual grief symptoms. She also reacts strongly to things such as noise and light, and is particularly sensitive to stimulants such as coffee.

Typically an HSP demonstrates greater caution and reluctance than the non-HSP population with things such as taking risks, trying new experiences, meeting new people, even venturing to unfamiliar places.

often intuitive and conscientious, the trait can come at a cost.

"I had trouble sleeping because I was always thinking about things. And because I was so sensitive to hurt, I closed off easily." As a result, her childhood was a lonely one. "I was never one of the gang," she says. Today, she acknowledges, her "brain is always looking for rejection." And, because she fears being "herself," relationships have proved difficult.

withdraw or attack. self-protection: minimizing, blaming, overachieving, inflating, projecting, and choosing not to compete.

All of these behaviors are defensive in nature and tend to exacerbate the condition further, as they often lead to an HSP's getting wounded twice — first when she feels the pain of a perceived slight (prompting her defensive response), and again when the other person responds aggressively to that reaction. "HSPs should carry a warning card,"

complex inner life and an active imagination. "Sensitive people ... may have suffered much pain (they were often of a delicate constitution) — but the damage to the inner self was less. How else to explain the paradox that prisoners of less hardy makeup were often able to survive life in the camps, whereas those of a more robust nature were not?"

tend to be creatively gifted, and that a large percentage have become famous because of their particular talents

being selective with our surroundings, minimizing stress, managing our nervous systems through things like yoga and exercise, and by carefully choosing whom we spend time with, HSPs can play to their strengths.

Cognitive behavioral therapy (where you challenge your negative thoughts with logic), as well as antidepressants, can also help. What's more, when an incident occurs that you find hurtful, Aron suggests clearing the air by sharing your reaction.

I take things personally, even things that others may not. intuitive to others' emotions and consider this one of my greatest strengths. inform those who you interact with most frequently to the fact that you're an HSP. How GREAT is it that we now are aware that it's due to the makeup of our brains and not just because we're big babies. no longer have to make excuses for my tears, need for sunglasses, and the crankiness I feel if I don't eat every 3 hours.


never really had any close friends. i find people to talk to, but we never stay close. and somehow i even manage to push them away. Antsy talkative tomboy girl. then when i started going to school, i remember being teased because of my frizzy hair and being left out of everything because i guess i was weird or something.

"dont take it to heart". its comforting what my parents say, but it still gets me down regardless, and it still keeps me up at night, what people said about me in elementary,all the way up to high school.


feel things intensely, which may cause some to suffer until they learn better coping skills. Sensitivity in itself isn't bad. However, if a sensitive person is raised in a home where it's not valued or it's belittled, then, yes, it can cause suffering until one realizes that sensitivity brings gifts.

pick up on verbal and nonverbal cues better than many. excellent memory. develop interpersonal skills


Because of my sensitivity and my appreciation for nonmaterial things, I have also found that I seem to be more content with life than many people I know.

As with many things in life, if one focuses on the positives of a situation, the negatives seem less or immaterial.

picked up from years of already feeling stigmatized and misunderstood.

personality trait we can learn to understand, manage, and appreciate.

You can't just "snap out" of being depressed and you can't snap out of being an HSP.


get therapy, see a psychologist, get on an antidepressant, exercise, be good to yourself, forgive yourself, pamper yourself.

These are not cures but they can bring relief. My favorite thing to do is read, and when fantastic articles like these are bursting through the pages of Marie Claire, reading will continue to bring relief from HSP symptoms.

gifts

Sensory detail
Nuances in meaning
Emotional awareness
Creativity
Greater empathy

Curses

Easily overwhelmed, over stimulated
Affected by emotions of others
Need lots of space and time to ourselves
Unhealthy perfectionism
Living out of sync with our culture

Holding back


“too many” highly sensitive children and adults “whose depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem prevent them from expressing whatever talents they have.”

“shy and fearful” rather than “sensitive and observant.”


Labeling and mislabeling

HSPs prefer to look before entering new situations, they are often called "shy." But shyness is learned, not innate. In fact, 30% of HSPs are extraverts, although the trait is often mislabeled as introversion. It has also been called inhibitedness, fearfulness, or neuroticism. Some HSPs behave in these ways, but it is not innate to do so and not the basic trait.

Taking care of yourself

Misdiagnosis

This is a specific trait with key consequences that in the past has often been confused with innate shyness, social anxiety problems,inhibitedness, or even social phobia and innate fearfulness, introversion, and so on.

"I'm Sensitive"

I was thinking that I might fly today
Just to disprove all the things you say
It doesn't take a talent to be mean
Your words can crush things that are unseen
So please be careful with me, I'm sensitive
And I'd like to stay that way.
You always tell me that is impossible
To be respected and be a girl
Why's it gotta be so complicated?
Why you gotta tell me if I'm hated?
So please be careful with me, I'm sensitive
And I'd like to stay that way.
I was thinking that it might do some good
If we robbed the cynics and took all their food
That way what they believe will have taken place
And we can give it to people who have some faith
So please be careful with me, I'm sensitive
And I'd like to stay that way.
I have this theory that if we're told we're bad
Then that's the only idea we'll ever have
But maybe if we are surrounded in beauty
Someday we will become what we see
'Cause anyone can start a conflict
it's harder yet to disregard it
I'd rather see the world from another angle
We are everyday angels
Be careful with me 'cause I'd like to stay that way


Create a Daily Routine
1. Your morning routine will set the tone for your day while your evening routine will influence the quality of your sleep.
2. Wake up 15-20 minutes earlier than usual to begin your morning routine.
3. Begin with some gentle stretching, yoga postures or light calisthenics.
4. Spend at least 15 minutes centering yourself through meditation, progressive relaxation or listening to a meditation tape.
5. Eat a nourishing breakfast slowly.
6. Leave plenty of time to commute to work.
7. Your evening activities should consist of calming endeavors such as reading uplifting books, writing, meditating, taking a bath or having light discussions.
8. Try not to watch over-stimulating or violent television shows in the evening.
9. For 30 minutes prior to going to sleep, turn off the day and go inward by meditating, listening to a relaxation tape or whatever helps you make the transition to a restful sleep.


Using the senses to calm the HSP
1. Avoid jarring noises by listening to relaxing background music or wearing earplugs.
2. Give yourself or receive a massage on a regular bases.
3. Reduce the time you are sitting in front of a television or computer screen and gaze at beautiful pictures or nature frequently.
4. Reduce your use of caffeine while drinking calming herbal teas and a lot of pure water.
5. Eat warm, nurturing food.
6. Try inhaling calming essential oils or incense.
7. Take a mini retreat twice a week and a longer retreat several times a year.


Important points in reducing time pressure
1. Listen to soothing music while driving slowly.
2. Try to avoid driving during peak traffic hours.
3. Utilize the opportunity of red lights and traffic jams as cues to spend time practicing relaxation techniques.
4. Regularly practice slow, walking meditations in nature to stay calm and focused in the present.
5. Try talking slower and being in silence sometimes.
6. Wait five seconds before responding during an intense conversation to reduce over-stimulating arguments.
7. Try mindful eating during at least one meal a week without engaging in any other stimuli, such as reading, watching television or talking.
8. Try writing and typing at a slower rate.
9. Transform the ring of the telephone into a relaxation cue by not answering the phone until the 3rd or 4th ring if possible, while using the precious moments to relax deeply.
10. Minimize your use of the computer, phones and television.


How to Create Enjoyable and Relaxing Work for the HSP
1. Try to develop a positive attitude toward your job by creating enjoyable social interactions, helping others and being enthusiastic about your work.
2. Listen to background music that is calming and maintain proper air circulation and temperature.
3. Gaze at pictures of natural settings; bring flowers and plants to work.
4. Have juice or herb tea and healthy snack foods available as well as uplifting magazines or articles for your clients or employees to read.
5. Have a comfortable chair to sit on. If you are sitting all day at work, periodically perform stretches and take short walks.
6. Throughout the day do some slow abdominal breathing exercises and take short meditation breaks.
7. If you are calm, your co-workers will be more relaxed creating interpersonal harmony. Don't forget to smile frequently.
8. Explore changes in your job schedule such as beginning work later, working from home or reducing your hours.
9. Create a daily work schedule each morning to plan a pressure-free day.
10. If you are working in a very stressful job that cannot be modified, examine your beliefs and values as to why you continue to work in a difficult situation.
11. Investigate new job possibilities that are well suited for your sensitivity.


deep empathy and high intensity, with powerful intuition, awareness, and intelligence.

You are sensitive, caring, and easily affected by the energy and emotions of others. These qualities make it easy to lose touch with your needs and desires.

A Sensitive Soul is intuitive, highly aware, and keenly observant of the subtleties of your environment, including energy, light, noise, smell, texture, and temperature. You may also be empathic or even psychic. Your perceptive skills operate in the physical, intellectual, emotional, and spiritual realms. You tie together things you see into complex and original concepts. This makes you a visionary.


a) You may be seen as shy or timid; and b) You may feel uncomfortably dissimilar to others because you respond so differently to stimulation.

A Sensitive Soul makes a great employee. You concentrate intensely and process multi-source information. However, you require privacy, uninterrupted time, and little or no pressure in order to do your best work.

have a passion for beauty, art, and aesthetics. You may be highly artistic and creative yourself. You easily create beauty and comfort. Seeing things out of alignment can actually be physically or psychically distressing.


Your inner life is just as intriguing and inspiring as your outer life. You likely have a rich, complex inner life and are highly imaginative. You may find it challenging to connect to real world priorities and realities.

You absolutely require private time alone in order to feel replenished. Up to 70% of Highly Sensitive Souls are introverted. But even extroverted sensitives need downtime to rejuvenate, often in a darkened, quiet room.

feel impatient with the truly mundane.